So I'm coming to the board for advice on this one. I think that I know the right way to handle the situation, but I'd like to see how many of you would handle a similar situation in the same way.
Quick Background:
Grew up in the same area as the girlfriend. We actually rode the school bus together way back when freshman year in high school and I was too chicken to ask her out. We both moved away and got married. We both got divorced and moved home. We ran into each other and have been dating for a few months now.
Situation:
She left her ex-husband at the beginning of the year because he was physically and emotionally abusive to her. After we had been dating a few weeks she showed me a few of the pictures from the bruises around her neck from the last time that he attacked her (the last straw when she left him). Since then every few weeks she'll get very nasty e-mails from him. She never responds to them and typically forwards them to me so I'm aware of what's going on. She got another one today. Here are the highlights of today's e-mail...
"I could care less what happens to you, but you shouldn't have left. I had a job, you had a business. you must be crazy to have left all that. You should've been begging to come back to me. but that doesn't matter since you've never looked back."
"you deserved everything that happened. I will never be sorry for what I did. you deserved much more than that. I was the best you will ever have. too bad for you that it's all downhill from now on." (in reference to beating her)"
"we had good times, ya know. Not my fault you were a crappy wife. the only thing I would change is I would have demanded to have your rings back in the divorce. you didn't deserve to walk away with those. you didn't deserve to walk away with anything."
"you were nothing but a bitch. ill give you this- you were good to my family. and you were good at what you did. but you were nothing but a bitch to me. you looked good with me. you made me look better. too bad you didn't fall in line."
"now that it would have been 5 years, know that you can't come back. ever. doesn't matter how much you beg or cry. I wouldn't take you. and I still say that I hope the new guy does what I told you you deserved. its all your worth." (referencing how he hopes that I abuse her physically)
So here's my question. Do I respond? Unfortunately she cannot change her e-mail address like she changed her phone number because she works for a University where the e-mail address is public. She has not responded as usual, but I'm getting tired of the way he's talking to her. Fast. He lives about 3 hours away so a physical altercation is unlikely but possible depending on how crazy he is (I'm not one for physical altercations). What would you do? Would you send him an e-mail back telling him to move on? Would you ignore it instead of giving him the attention that it seems he might be looking for. I'm open for any kind of suggestions here. Go ahead and give me some thoughts.
Quick Background:
Grew up in the same area as the girlfriend. We actually rode the school bus together way back when freshman year in high school and I was too chicken to ask her out. We both moved away and got married. We both got divorced and moved home. We ran into each other and have been dating for a few months now.
Situation:
She left her ex-husband at the beginning of the year because he was physically and emotionally abusive to her. After we had been dating a few weeks she showed me a few of the pictures from the bruises around her neck from the last time that he attacked her (the last straw when she left him). Since then every few weeks she'll get very nasty e-mails from him. She never responds to them and typically forwards them to me so I'm aware of what's going on. She got another one today. Here are the highlights of today's e-mail...
"I could care less what happens to you, but you shouldn't have left. I had a job, you had a business. you must be crazy to have left all that. You should've been begging to come back to me. but that doesn't matter since you've never looked back."
"you deserved everything that happened. I will never be sorry for what I did. you deserved much more than that. I was the best you will ever have. too bad for you that it's all downhill from now on." (in reference to beating her)"
"we had good times, ya know. Not my fault you were a crappy wife. the only thing I would change is I would have demanded to have your rings back in the divorce. you didn't deserve to walk away with those. you didn't deserve to walk away with anything."
"you were nothing but a bitch. ill give you this- you were good to my family. and you were good at what you did. but you were nothing but a bitch to me. you looked good with me. you made me look better. too bad you didn't fall in line."
"now that it would have been 5 years, know that you can't come back. ever. doesn't matter how much you beg or cry. I wouldn't take you. and I still say that I hope the new guy does what I told you you deserved. its all your worth." (referencing how he hopes that I abuse her physically)
So here's my question. Do I respond? Unfortunately she cannot change her e-mail address like she changed her phone number because she works for a University where the e-mail address is public. She has not responded as usual, but I'm getting tired of the way he's talking to her. Fast. He lives about 3 hours away so a physical altercation is unlikely but possible depending on how crazy he is (I'm not one for physical altercations). What would you do? Would you send him an e-mail back telling him to move on? Would you ignore it instead of giving him the attention that it seems he might be looking for. I'm open for any kind of suggestions here. Go ahead and give me some thoughts.
