LMAO!
JACKSONVILLE, FL—Apologizing to Jaguars fans for his early failures in leading the team,
Jacksonville coach Urban Meyer admitted to reporters Tuesday that he is still adjusting to
the speed of NFL cover-ups. “At the college level, these scandals take a lot longer to develop,
and I’ll admit I just haven’t done the work to adjust my press strategy from Ohio State,”
said Meyer, who explained that he was often able to shut down a damaging story or sweep
a player’s transgressions under the rug with a single phone call while running a college
program. “The NFL media ecosystem is just more complex than college, so I can’t run
with the same simple denials I used in the past. I’m dealing with grown adults now, and
lots of people have their own ideas that I can’t just override by throwing them off the team
or threatening to take away a scholarship. Jaguars fans deserve a better level of cover-up
than I’ve been providing, and I’m committed to learning and getting better.” At press time,
Meyer had hired a former assistant from the Steelers so he could learn how they managed
to sweep everything Ben Roethlisberger has done under the rug.
JACKSONVILLE, FL—Apologizing to Jaguars fans for his early failures in leading the team,
Jacksonville coach Urban Meyer admitted to reporters Tuesday that he is still adjusting to
the speed of NFL cover-ups. “At the college level, these scandals take a lot longer to develop,
and I’ll admit I just haven’t done the work to adjust my press strategy from Ohio State,”
said Meyer, who explained that he was often able to shut down a damaging story or sweep
a player’s transgressions under the rug with a single phone call while running a college
program. “The NFL media ecosystem is just more complex than college, so I can’t run
with the same simple denials I used in the past. I’m dealing with grown adults now, and
lots of people have their own ideas that I can’t just override by throwing them off the team
or threatening to take away a scholarship. Jaguars fans deserve a better level of cover-up
than I’ve been providing, and I’m committed to learning and getting better.” At press time,
Meyer had hired a former assistant from the Steelers so he could learn how they managed
to sweep everything Ben Roethlisberger has done under the rug.
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