First, let me state that being my mom’s primary caregiver has been really tough the past 8 weeks. We are at the point where she has been approved to be in the program for that new drug that stops the spread of the protein that causes the disease, but must pass a couple of physical tests to be fully in. As the first test approached this morning, she became worse by the day, breaking out into tears 4-5 times a day, telling me she didn’t want to go through all of the extensive medical stuff and just wanted to die..shit like that. A few weeks ago I had all I could take and told her I had been there many times, and there were times I was living purely out of anger and spite..refusing to give up because I told myself that if I quit, then the undefined “They”…the people I hate in society that have no compassion for others and look down upon people like me..they would win. I couldn’t allow that to happen and for a long time, it was day to day living only out of spite. I told her she had to make a decision, show the toughness she’s had all her life, or if she really didn‘t want to live anymore, quit crying about it and just do it. I said her self pity is not like her..especially saying she didn’t want to live because of some medical procedures that are no big deal if she wanted to be in that program and live another decade or more. I said they could have a cure long before then, and she should be enthusiastic instead of wallowing in self pity. I finished by saying if she really wanted to die, then just do it already, I won’t think any less of her. what she is going through is part of the human condition, as the truth is life is ugly, brutish, and short. It’s up to us to make life as happy as possible, but if she wants to give up than do it and quit putting me and dad through all of this.
Well that settled her down until her scheduled spinal tap this morning to see if another additional chemical excretion caused by Alzheimer’s had traveled down her spine and were at a level that was too high for her to be in the drug program. She was so uncooperative that they canceled the procedure and we rescheduled it where she will be put under anesthesia for a simple tap I’ve had done that is simple and painless. I’m handling this job far better than I wouldn’t have thought in my wildest expectations, as I seriously didn’t know if I could do this given my serious psychiatric disorders and other issues.. but I’m doing a great job according to pops and I’m staying consistent. However, the stress is considerable and it’s coming out in little ways..like the return of some obsessive habits I thought I grew out of..like hypersexual behavior. That’s a whole story I can’t post here..but I have 3 no strings partners in my neighborhood, 2 ex gfs who got divorced and are back in town, and since I always make sure to become close friends with all my ex’s, I’m the first guy they call when they back in town. Now I’m getting involved with a 29 yr old Goth Chick from my dispensary who I just made a light suggestive joke to because we have become kinda friends that she took seriously…and let me tell you..Tinder and other internet hook up sites have changed young women..they are far more bold and direct than they used to be. For once, I was caught off guard, and to recover, I said I was booked up until the end of February, and I wanted her to really think about hooking up with a guy 1 year younger than her dad. If she still felt the same, we would go from there…but she is already texting me naked pics and shit…god, the life I lead, sometimes I wish I didnt have no fear to say anything to anyone..my life would be far less complicated.
After this morning’s disaster, I smoked some Indica and decided to check out The Athletic, which I haven’t read since before Michigan won it all. The first story about Corum nearly brought me to tears because he’s so different than every other athlete. He’s the genuine article, a great kid who cares more about others than he does about himself. He really doesn’t care about money or the trappings of stardom..I’ll always follow his life closely because I think he’s destined for far greater things than just Football. This country needs a whole lot more Blake Corums ..I can say that with certainty.
Then I read this article about Jared Goff and I couldn’t hold the tears back any longer. The part about him creating that clothing company with all sales going to create a scholarship fund for the kids of Detroit, and the fact he matches every dollar with his own money, and let’s the students of Detroit interested in Art and Design make the Detroit centric designs on the clothing line, well…more people need to know about that. Then I read about how he went to Jalen’s school to give out some scholarships, and instead of just being there an hour and leaving like most Athletes do..he hung out with the kids all day talking with him. combine that with all the support from his teammates…man..he’s the type of man I wish I could be..but with my anger and lust for vengeance against bullies and abusers ..the fact I have so much hate in me..I could never be the type of men Blake and Jarrod are. I try though. The stress from this morning made me cry like a baby..and I’m not a cryer..at all. I’ll link the article about Goff. He’s a real Detroiter now and I wouldn’t want anyone else as QB for the Lions. (Looks like I can’t link it through my NY Times subscription. Just go to the Lions page on The Athletic..it’s there and is a must read)
Now, as far as Michigan’s next HC..When Kraft had Mayo already lined up as the next HC to keep the culture Belichick and Brady established as the Patriot way. It really made me think about Michigan. In his interview, Mayo said he definitely wasn’t Bill, but the biggest thing he learned from him is that “Hard work..works.” Doing your job works, selflessness for the team works…and those 3 things are the essence of the Patriot way. In Michigan’s case, who can argue that Schembechler’s beliefs and the way he recruited and coached has defined the Modern Age of Michigan Football for the last 50 years? The one time Michigan hired a coach outside the culture it was a complete disaster that set the program back for 7 long years. I hated the hire from day 1, and I’ll finally admit that I rarely watched RR’s games in his thankfully short tenure. The pizza guy could have hired Harbaugh then, but he wanted a coach he could manipulate, so he hire Brady Hoke, who loved Michigan but was too nice a guy for the job. I remember him pitching many times that the program was a big family and though he landed a lot of highly ranked recruits, they were all nice guys without any dog in them with the exception of Lewan and a few others. He couldn’t hire a competent coordinator to save his life, and that apology to that evil bridge troll Dantonio for the spike incident was the last straw for me. I remember watching probably the worst victory over PSU Michigan ever played..a torturous to watch 18-16 win that caused me to say to Pop..I can’t watch this anymore..and didn’t watch another game until Hoke was mercifly fired and the guy I wanted all along, maybe the only guy who could save Michigan from becoming Nebraska, actually was hired. 9 years later, he accomplished everything he set out to do. I’d love it if he stayed..but I don’t think that’s Jim’s nature. He has a goal, achieves it, and then it’s on to the next mountain to climb. How can anyone be upset the he wants to win the SB? or that he is not giving out an explanation of what his intentions are? He’s earned the right to do whatever he wants next and we should be grateful for his time here.
But there was an important lesson to be learned in those 7 dark years we spent lost in the wilderness before Harbaugh, the quintessential Michigan man and Schembechler disciple, restored Michigan to glory. We should be like Kraft and the Patriots, grooming the next coach who is already on the staff and understands The football religion that is Schembechler’s beliefs of what being a Michigan man is all about, and how you get to the top and stay there, by playing a crushing physical style on both sides of the ball with a team of selfless guys who make the sacrifices for The Team The Team The Team. To me, looking at a Brian Kelly or anyone who isn’t part of the coaching staff now, after how hard Jim and his players worked to bring Michigan back to it’s Schembechler deep roots and won it all by dominating teams loaded with ”5 star” talent, with a Michigan team that played a vicious style of an old school Michigan Team made up of a large majority of 3 and 4 star dogs ..abosolutely hungry dogs who ran faster and played like they were fighting to eat, playing like a Schembechler team..in unison and for each other, I can’t see Michigan going outside the program again. Hire either Moore, Minter, or Hart..those are the only candidates to consider. And make sure that years before the next HC is ready to retire or move to the Pros, The AD has 2 or 3 guys who have been groomed in the Michigan Football Culture ready to step in seamlessly to keep Schembechler’s teachings and spirit alive and well in the building named after him. I don’t want to hear about any outside candidates unless they are ex Michigan players ready to step in and keep the Michigan Steamroller going. We can’t go back to those 7 years I just refuse to acknowledge ever happened. I don’t watch any repeats of games from those years because they were about as far from playing Schembechler football as you can get. I will hate Bill Martin for the rest of my life, the pizza guy as well…and we can’t ever make that mistake again.
Go read that article about Goff becoming a real Detroiter on The Athletic, I dare you not to get emotional about.
2023…The greatest Football year of my life that’s only gonna get better when the Lions shock the world by beating the Bills in the Superbowl.
Schembechler Football forever yo - Argus
Well that settled her down until her scheduled spinal tap this morning to see if another additional chemical excretion caused by Alzheimer’s had traveled down her spine and were at a level that was too high for her to be in the drug program. She was so uncooperative that they canceled the procedure and we rescheduled it where she will be put under anesthesia for a simple tap I’ve had done that is simple and painless. I’m handling this job far better than I wouldn’t have thought in my wildest expectations, as I seriously didn’t know if I could do this given my serious psychiatric disorders and other issues.. but I’m doing a great job according to pops and I’m staying consistent. However, the stress is considerable and it’s coming out in little ways..like the return of some obsessive habits I thought I grew out of..like hypersexual behavior. That’s a whole story I can’t post here..but I have 3 no strings partners in my neighborhood, 2 ex gfs who got divorced and are back in town, and since I always make sure to become close friends with all my ex’s, I’m the first guy they call when they back in town. Now I’m getting involved with a 29 yr old Goth Chick from my dispensary who I just made a light suggestive joke to because we have become kinda friends that she took seriously…and let me tell you..Tinder and other internet hook up sites have changed young women..they are far more bold and direct than they used to be. For once, I was caught off guard, and to recover, I said I was booked up until the end of February, and I wanted her to really think about hooking up with a guy 1 year younger than her dad. If she still felt the same, we would go from there…but she is already texting me naked pics and shit…god, the life I lead, sometimes I wish I didnt have no fear to say anything to anyone..my life would be far less complicated.
After this morning’s disaster, I smoked some Indica and decided to check out The Athletic, which I haven’t read since before Michigan won it all. The first story about Corum nearly brought me to tears because he’s so different than every other athlete. He’s the genuine article, a great kid who cares more about others than he does about himself. He really doesn’t care about money or the trappings of stardom..I’ll always follow his life closely because I think he’s destined for far greater things than just Football. This country needs a whole lot more Blake Corums ..I can say that with certainty.
Then I read this article about Jared Goff and I couldn’t hold the tears back any longer. The part about him creating that clothing company with all sales going to create a scholarship fund for the kids of Detroit, and the fact he matches every dollar with his own money, and let’s the students of Detroit interested in Art and Design make the Detroit centric designs on the clothing line, well…more people need to know about that. Then I read about how he went to Jalen’s school to give out some scholarships, and instead of just being there an hour and leaving like most Athletes do..he hung out with the kids all day talking with him. combine that with all the support from his teammates…man..he’s the type of man I wish I could be..but with my anger and lust for vengeance against bullies and abusers ..the fact I have so much hate in me..I could never be the type of men Blake and Jarrod are. I try though. The stress from this morning made me cry like a baby..and I’m not a cryer..at all. I’ll link the article about Goff. He’s a real Detroiter now and I wouldn’t want anyone else as QB for the Lions. (Looks like I can’t link it through my NY Times subscription. Just go to the Lions page on The Athletic..it’s there and is a must read)
Now, as far as Michigan’s next HC..When Kraft had Mayo already lined up as the next HC to keep the culture Belichick and Brady established as the Patriot way. It really made me think about Michigan. In his interview, Mayo said he definitely wasn’t Bill, but the biggest thing he learned from him is that “Hard work..works.” Doing your job works, selflessness for the team works…and those 3 things are the essence of the Patriot way. In Michigan’s case, who can argue that Schembechler’s beliefs and the way he recruited and coached has defined the Modern Age of Michigan Football for the last 50 years? The one time Michigan hired a coach outside the culture it was a complete disaster that set the program back for 7 long years. I hated the hire from day 1, and I’ll finally admit that I rarely watched RR’s games in his thankfully short tenure. The pizza guy could have hired Harbaugh then, but he wanted a coach he could manipulate, so he hire Brady Hoke, who loved Michigan but was too nice a guy for the job. I remember him pitching many times that the program was a big family and though he landed a lot of highly ranked recruits, they were all nice guys without any dog in them with the exception of Lewan and a few others. He couldn’t hire a competent coordinator to save his life, and that apology to that evil bridge troll Dantonio for the spike incident was the last straw for me. I remember watching probably the worst victory over PSU Michigan ever played..a torturous to watch 18-16 win that caused me to say to Pop..I can’t watch this anymore..and didn’t watch another game until Hoke was mercifly fired and the guy I wanted all along, maybe the only guy who could save Michigan from becoming Nebraska, actually was hired. 9 years later, he accomplished everything he set out to do. I’d love it if he stayed..but I don’t think that’s Jim’s nature. He has a goal, achieves it, and then it’s on to the next mountain to climb. How can anyone be upset the he wants to win the SB? or that he is not giving out an explanation of what his intentions are? He’s earned the right to do whatever he wants next and we should be grateful for his time here.
But there was an important lesson to be learned in those 7 dark years we spent lost in the wilderness before Harbaugh, the quintessential Michigan man and Schembechler disciple, restored Michigan to glory. We should be like Kraft and the Patriots, grooming the next coach who is already on the staff and understands The football religion that is Schembechler’s beliefs of what being a Michigan man is all about, and how you get to the top and stay there, by playing a crushing physical style on both sides of the ball with a team of selfless guys who make the sacrifices for The Team The Team The Team. To me, looking at a Brian Kelly or anyone who isn’t part of the coaching staff now, after how hard Jim and his players worked to bring Michigan back to it’s Schembechler deep roots and won it all by dominating teams loaded with ”5 star” talent, with a Michigan team that played a vicious style of an old school Michigan Team made up of a large majority of 3 and 4 star dogs ..abosolutely hungry dogs who ran faster and played like they were fighting to eat, playing like a Schembechler team..in unison and for each other, I can’t see Michigan going outside the program again. Hire either Moore, Minter, or Hart..those are the only candidates to consider. And make sure that years before the next HC is ready to retire or move to the Pros, The AD has 2 or 3 guys who have been groomed in the Michigan Football Culture ready to step in seamlessly to keep Schembechler’s teachings and spirit alive and well in the building named after him. I don’t want to hear about any outside candidates unless they are ex Michigan players ready to step in and keep the Michigan Steamroller going. We can’t go back to those 7 years I just refuse to acknowledge ever happened. I don’t watch any repeats of games from those years because they were about as far from playing Schembechler football as you can get. I will hate Bill Martin for the rest of my life, the pizza guy as well…and we can’t ever make that mistake again.
Go read that article about Goff becoming a real Detroiter on The Athletic, I dare you not to get emotional about.
2023…The greatest Football year of my life that’s only gonna get better when the Lions shock the world by beating the Bills in the Superbowl.
Schembechler Football forever yo - Argus
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